Frustrated with my weight

At the moment one of the things that are really bugging me that I could easily change is my weight, it’s at the top end of the BMI and I would prefer to be in the middle of the range. I then have cheekbones that could cut glass and a clavicle that is really well defined.

I am currently under the eating disorder team again because when Bella died in the 7 weeks that followed that happening I dropped 10kg’s without really trying, but I spotted it and asked for help and hence my weekly therapy with them. The therapist that I have is really good as she has done a lot of different areas in giving therapy so can see how complex my needs are at the moment.

She had permission from the head of the service to keep me on as a client till I get seen for grief counselling. I mentioned that I wanted to drop a bit of weight in this week’s session and she was quite clear that she thought that would be a bad idea for me to do. As my anorexia is active at the moment not as bad as it can get but I don’t need to encourage it.

Also, she explained that she expects me to drop weight quickly and significantly once I start with grief therapy, as she has experience in this area. So wants me to be in a place where that can happen and not risk me ending up underweight as that would then be another issue to tackle.