The lost month of November

Bella’s death caused me to enter a mixed episode, so I had some depressive traits and some manic traits. These are the moods I can’t spot happening, and as a result, are very dangerous for me. I have now had two major episodes of this type and both times I ended up in hospital.

This time things played out differently to the time before and to my normal mood swings. Before November came around I had experienced a psychotic period of the episode I was in. It covered a few days with different things happening at times; I experienced hallucinations, delusional thoughts and paranoia just…